Why aren't you married yet?

So I'm getting closer to the dreaded 3-0 . For a single woman, society's made us think that's what it is - but I don't dread it all. As a single soon-to-be 29-year-old, I embrace it. This isn't one of those blogs that take shots at relationships or marriage, I'm just a girl...not just a girl...and this is my take on it.

You know what really grinds my gears? People asking me when I'm going to get married and settle down. Bitc....hold on....almost lost my cool there. I will settle down when I want to. I don't need anyone asking me or pressuring me to do so. 30 is not the end of the road for me and I refuse to let anyone tell me otherwise. What if I never get married? Does that make me any less of a woman? Does the fact that I'm not hitched downplay my other accomplishments or traits? I think not.

I know of too many women who settle for crap from a guy just to get a ring. News flash hun, if he's cheating on you now and you're putting up with it, what makes you think he'll stop when you're married? What do you aspire to be? The wife of a cheater? An AIDS/HIV statistic? Oh,...but you love him? That's nice. Let me know how you feel about him when he gets his sweetheart pregnant or she's calling your phone at 3 a.m.

Not knocking the marriage thing at all because I do want that some day. I have a few friends who are married and its working wonderfully for them. Shout out to you guys. One day that will be me. But for right now I'm just...chilling. I have things I want to accomplish and places I want to see, so sorry if I'm not completely focused on that aspect of life. Not that getting married would hinder me from doing any of that stuff, just saying, I'm not focused on it because I know it will happen for me and when it does happen that will be one lucky guy .

There's this guy I know, he's kind of been on my line for awhile, but I've never given him the time of day. He said to me the other day, He guesses " I'm not ready for something serious yet because I keep pushing him away" and he's " sure I don't want another 2 years of sitting in a crowd of weddings", so he will wait me out. Seriously? You have nothing better to do than to wait for me to be ready to be with you?

Before you think I'm a bitch, hear me out. This dude legit has nothing going for himself. No dreams or aspirations. He lives to Instagram stunt (totally a thing) and lies about the money he makes and he some how thinks that I will be so tired of waiting for "Mr. Right" (not that I am waiting) that I will just fall into his arms. Ahahahaha

I may not have an exact  physical  type of guy that I'm attracted to but I need a guy that can mentally stimulate me. One that I can learn from. I love a smart and passionate man. There is nothing sexier than a man who is focused and works hard for the things he wants in life, because that's the kind of person I am. I need a man whose drive matches mine. I know no one is perfect but not having drive is kind of deal breaker for me.

Anyhoo, like I said before, I'm not perfect either and I'm working on myself daily and at this stage in my life I am just over the bullshit and games. I honestly don't have the energy or patience for it. So I chose to be single. I don't think anything is wrong with that, especially if you use the time to better yourself. The goal isn't to be Ms. SingleindependentIdontneedamnan  but I want to be a better version of the person I am today.

 I'm not trying to find someone to complete me because I am complete. COMPLETEly happy, COMPLETEly secure with myself, COMPLETEly and unapologetically me, and when the right guy does come along I'll be ready.